February 4, 2010

“Finding Joy”

Happy Thursday! I hope all you lovely ladies are getting excited to the end of the week and the beginning of the weekend! I don’t have a craft for you today because I would like to talk about a subject that was discussed in our bible study this morning. The speaker Jaimie is also a fellow blogger whom you have to check out at The Wonder Years. She is a mommy of two boys, ages 4 1/2 and 2 1/2. She spoke to us today about Finding Joy.

The first thing she told us was that there are 4 things that cause us to lose our joy:

1) Comparison

-We compare ourselves to other moms constantly. When those moms walk in with their breakfast dish hot, styled hair and clothes, and their 4 kids in tow you start comparing your cold dish, messy hair, sweat-wearing self to her and put yourself down. To make up for it we start putting them down in our minds any way possible to lift ourselves up. We all compare on a daily basis. I compare all the time, especially when it comes to living situation. “My husband is without a job so we have to live with his parents.” This is what I think about my situation. What I should be thinking is “We are lucky to have a roof over our heads and food on our table.” Instead of comparisons, choose contentment!

 

"I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.” Philippians 4:12

2) Isolation

-As most of you fellow moms know we have the tendency to isolate ourselves from the outside world. We have those days when all we want to do is stay inside because it is too much work to get our kids dressed and ready to go let alone ourselves. Another time we feel isolated is when we are one of the only ones out of our friends who has a kid. This is especially true when you are my age (24) and most of my friends are not even married. What we need to do is force ourselves to get out of the house and participate in activities such as MOPS (Mothers of Pre-Schoolers). This is such a wonderful place to interact with other moms who are going through the same thing as you now or have already done it and get guide you! Instead of isolation, choose involvement!

“A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.” Proverbs 18:24

3) Mommy-Guilt

-Oh boy how we all have mommy-guilt! We start blaming ourselves for everything bad that happens to our children whether we were there or not. “If I had been there, she would not have been hurt.” So many of us think this on almost a daily basis and we are driving ourselves crazy!!!! We cannot sit here and blame ourselves for things we cannot control. With that being said, we can also not protect or children from everything bad in this world. Sometimes children need to get hurt to learn not to do something. What we might want to stop. God wants them to learn to become wiser. Instead of fear, choose grace.

“The reason I wrote you was to see if you would stand the test and be obedient in everything. If you forgive anyone, I also forgive him. And what I have forgiven—if there was anything to forgive—I have forgiven in the sight of Christ for your sake, in order that Satan might not outwit us. For we are not unaware of his schemes.” 2 Corinthians 2:9-11

4) Fear

-I think Jaimie saved this one for last because it is the most relevant to all moms. Fear: a distressing emotion aroused by impending danger, evil, pain, etc., whether the threat is real or imagined. I think that sums us mothers up pretty darn well when it comes to our children. We fear for their safety, we fear for their well-being, we fear for their future. Fear, fear, fear! That is a scary word when you think about it and that is how it sometimes overwhelms us. If we walk around fearing the unknown we will never learn to appreciate what is in front of us. All we are seeing is the fear of our child falling off the monkey bars instead of realizing their “big kid” accomplishment. Think of how fearful the Mother of Moses was. She had to hide Moses for 3 months and then place him in a basket in the reeds of the Nile to protect him from being killed by Pharaoh. She had to place her child in God’s hands knowing he would protect Moses, which he did. He was found by Pharaohs daughter and grew up to be a great man of God. Instead of fear, his mother chose faith.

“Fear of man will prove to be a snare, but whoever trusts in the LORD is kept safe. “Proverbs 29:25

“For I am the LORD, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you.” Isaiah 41:13

So instead of those 4 things that take away our joy let’s make sure we have these four things to keep our joy: Contentment, Involvement, Grace, & Faith. Stay strong in your trust in God and turn to other moms when you are losing your joy. Together we can find our joy!

There is no way to be a perfect mother, but a million ways to be a great one!”

Here is a video I made about my daughter and those days where I need to make sure I find Joy:



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